Black Women Rock(...but we know this!) & Sacred Revolution (Hallelujah!)

March 4th-6th

Black Women Rock

Charles H. Wright Museum of African American History

Detroit, MI

Black Women Rock!

Women’s Herstory Month has been off the chain and it ain't over yet! I had a great time at Black Women Rock in Detroit and at Sacred Revolution in Harlem. I wish I had time to give you a full recap, but I’ll give you the highlights.

Jessica Care Moore

Black Women Rock was amazing! Jessica Care Moore has been hosting that event for about 12 years now and it is all that the title says. Even with all the gentrification that is happening in Detroit, the city is still Black and it was great to play for what was mostly an audience of Black people. Yes this happens in New York too, but when it happens out of state it just feels a bit more special. Most of the folks in the room had no idea who I was, but after the show was over there was so much love and gratitude coming my way.

Kisma

As I came from backstage at intermission I ran into two girls, Naja and Chole who gasped when the saw me. They said they were looking for me, which really warmed my heart. We took a selfie together, I gave them a little music biz advice (yes I did), we laughed and honestly I could have gone home after that for real. That made my whole night. They had so much love.

Naja & Chloe! Rising Stars!

Then when I went upstairs to the merch table to sign a few CDs, these women told me that after seeing my set they felt “more free.” Now that’s what I’m talking about! Let me tell you something. Playing for people who don’t know you from Eve and they still give you love is really what it’s all about. New York makes you tough as an artist. People here have the screw face before one note comes out. In New York, the vibe is, “I came out of the house so you better be good. Now impress me!” Outside of New York, the vibe is, “I came out of the house, so let’s have a good time!” So that’s what we did.

Gold jumpsuit. Feather cap. Tambourine. Let's Go! 

I am so thankful to Jessica for inviting me. I’m so glad I got to meet my sisters in music, some whom I’ve been hearing about for a long time. So thank you again Jessica for bringing me together with Kimberly Nichole (once again), Nik West, Divinity Roxx, Ideeyah, Steffanie Christi'an, Kimsa, Mama Soul and K’Valentine.

Me & Nik West: Bass Inspiration 

Thank you Tammy, EttaFLY and Sabrina for your love, joy and coordination! That weekend reminded me no matter how rough the road feels sometimes, I am exactly where I need to be.

Ideeyah

Divinity Roxx

Black Women Rock, the show, was on Saturday, but there was a panel with some of the artists back at the Charles H. Wright Museum on Sunday. I stayed for the panel as long as I could, but I had to head back to New York and straight to rehearsal for Sacred Revolution. Kimberly Nichole, Kat Dyson and I had all been in Detroit together, so we were all a little loopy at rehearsal that night, but the next day were ready to go!

K'Valentine

Mama Soul reppin' Flint, MI

Steffanie Christi'an

Sabrina Nelson: Visual Artist

Nik West

March 7th

Sacred Revolution

Schomburg Center, Harlem, NYC

Sacred Revolution

Sacred Revolution was part of the Schomburg’s Women’s Jazz Festival curated by Toshi Reagon. That evening we were celebrating the music of Mavis Staples, Mahalia Jackson and Sister Rosetta Tharpe so you know I had to pull out my great grandmother’s hat for that one. Honey, that night was spirit filled! We had an actual B3 organ onstage! So between Sam on the organ and Glenn on the piano I knew we were going to have church for real! Sacred Revolution brought me together for the first time with vocalists Jhetti Lashley, Christina Sayles and Josette Newsam-Marchak and back together with Kimberly Nichole, Marcelle Davies Lashley and of course Toshi Reagon. Fred Cash on bass, Kat Dyson on guitar and Shirazette Tinnin on drums rounded out the band.  Kimberly Nichole and I sang a duet on Sister Rosetta Tharpe’s “Didn’t it Rain,” which we will reprise on the 20th at her show at Subrosa (NYC), and I can’t wait for that!

Toshi Reagon

Christina Sayles

Jhetti Lashley

Kimberly Nichole

Marcelle Davies Lashley

There were so many takeaways from that Sacred Revolution show. Christina singing “It is Well,” Marcelle singing “Come Sunday” and Toshi singing “Rock Me,” but for me the stand out moment or the one that resonated with me the most was Jhetti singing “Can’t No Grave Hold My Body Down.” It was such a lovely weekend, but you know the devil is always afoot! Ha! But “can’t no grave hold my body down,” for me meant that can’t no bad energy, or bad vibes, or someone else’s BS or negativity hold me down. There is only one way this spirit is going and that’s up! So hear this devil, I see you and you will not win today! The doors of the church are open.

Josette Newsam-Marchak

The Nikole Sisters (Shelley Nicole & Kimberly Nichole)

Sam Guillaume and the B3!

My Nana's hat (Nana Perry in the house!)

Thank you for rolling with me on a little piece of my journey. I’ll be back with a recap of the upcoming BROAKlyn show in Oakland!  I can’t wait to see my Bay Area/Michfest fam. It’s gonna be an amazing time!

Credits:
Black Women Rock Photos by Abby Oladipo
Sacred Revolution Photos by Bob Gore

Michfest 40: The Final Countdown * Chix: The Revolution (Part 6)

Wednesday, September 9, 2015
I’m walking over the Brooklyn Bridge heading home from my sometime-y day gig and I’m on the phone with my girl Po-Hong. We hadn’t talked in a while so walking over the bridge was a good way to get a good long catch up in and take in the scenery. In the midst of the convo in pops Fest and what it has done for us, and how we are in some deep denial about it ending. I started to wax nostalgic about it all when she reminded me that she had only gone twice, but since going her whole life changed. I had gone for 9 years and I can say the exact same thing, but what of the women who grew up there? I mean what of the women who went through their 20s and 30s there? I mention this because when I think about my 20s and 30s and how pivotal a time in my life that was it’s astounding. I mean I think that’s why it’s so hard for me to think about leaving New York. I grew up here. I’ve now lived here longer than the town I was raised in. New York is home.

If you went to the land for the first time in your teens (as was Lisa when she started the damn thing), or in the 20s, that is EVERYTHING. In my 20s there was no stopping me! Everything was doable and I knew it. I was very clear about it even in my uncertainty. I changed how I ate, I started making my own music, I was singing in bands, I started writing music, I was working out and staying out late. Drinking and carrying on hunny, and it was good! Really it was amazing! Everything about that time is amplified and romanticized, but at the time that Festival was started I’m sure it was like a tall glass of ice cold water on a hot ass day! I mean think about it. It’s 1976 and there they were. Creating a world of their own. One that was safe, testosterone free, free of sexism, free of homophobia, free of the stresses of every day life, free to commune among the trees with your sisters. Free! Sound like Utopia right? Well of course it does. But was it Utopia, of course it wasn’t, but that doesn’t matter to make my point here. The point is that these women created a world. They made their own Paradise Island in the woods. They created a safe haven in a world where things were not safe for women in general and lesbians in specific on a daily basis. It was everyone working together. The workers, the artists and the festival-goers. It was that combined energy that made Lisa say she would “never do it again” and then do it 39 more times. How do you say no to that kind of community? How do you turn your back on that deep of an intention? You don’t. You carry on. So again, I am thinking about these women and those who are a part of this legacy. Those who also invested with love (in all the ways it shows up) and sweat equity. Those like Shirley and Juanita and Julie and Myrna and Connie and Jenn and Bob and Sam and Chewy and Falcon and Aleah and Yaniyah and Martha and B.E. and Bonnie and Penny and Ubaka and Pat and Myrna and Deb and Karen and Cassandra and Alyson and Martha and Qween and Terri Lynn and Jill and Kelly and Tory and Sue and Shira and Emily and Felicia and Susan and so on and so on and so on and so on who loved and fought and hugged and kissed and made up and broke up and mended fences and cried and laughed and healed and danced and married and separated and had babies and left all kinds of trouble behind, and worked till they were exhausted and partied the same way, found a way out of no way and protected each other as it were the last days on earth.  Trailblazers. Career breakers. Business owners. I feel like I am rambling on, but I must say this. For me, these women Sweet Honey in the Rock, Linda Tillery, Casselberry-Dupree, Toshi Reagon, Ruthie Foster, Vicki Randle, Karen Williams, Mimi Gonzalez, Marga Gomez, for me, they are the ones. Some I knew about and others I learned about when I got to the land. You can’t be a black girl and not know Sweet Honey, but you can be a black girl and not know about Linda Tillery or Casselberry-Dupree so I learned. I got hip to so many artists I should have known, but did not know at all. I was schooled and I loved every waking and sleeping moment of it under the stars.

Pre-Night Stage love with Cris Williamson

Saturday August 8th (Continued…)
I got myself dressed and ready for Hanifah’s set. I’ve really been into jumpsuits and rompers lately so I found a little number at Mandy no less. I guess they are still “to the rescue.” You gotta be a New Yorker to get that joke, but anyway… I was still being as silent as possible as I prepared to hit the stage. As I said, Hanifah’s set and Chix were the only slots I was originally slated to do so no matter what, I had to make it work for tonight.

Hanifah is always great as usual! The crew for Fest this year was Christelle Durandy on keys & backing vox, DJ Rimarkable on Live & backing vox and me on tambourine, backing vox and shakers. Besides doing joints from her band St. Lo we also kicked into Irene Cara’s “Flashdance… What a Feeling!” Why? The flow of Hanifah’s set in part was about her time at the festival and what it has meant to her over the years. The set was a little emotional because I felt like it was full circle for me. When I first came to Fest 9 years ago I came with Hanifah. For some reason she chose me to be her bassist and honestly she is only one of three people I have ever played bass for besides myself. She will always have a special place in my heart for bringing me to Fest all those years ago.

Hanifah Walidah

I remember that first year thinking to myself that I didn’t know how I was going to get back to Fest, but I had to go back. Lo and behold, Hanifah was asked back two more times in a row for night stage and eventually I was invited to play on Day Stage with my band blaKbüshe!

I got through Hanifah’s set this year with no problem. My voice had worked, but now I needed to shut up again to make it through my songs on Chix Lix. I was just supposed to sing “Stronger” by Kelly Clarkson, but Toshi asked me to sing with her for Chix and of course I said yes.

Between Hanifah and Chix was Ferron. Talk about beautiful. I was taken back to the first time I saw Ferron on night stage. In 2008 she shared the evening with Bitch and it was magical. Everyone, including me was in tears so you know it was magic. Anyway, this year was no exception. Since it was Saturday night, the last Night Stage ever, people were taking their time and Ferron did the same. She had an amazing set. I was supposed to be chilling just getting my voice together. I was quiet, but I had to see the set. When Ferron finished it was time for the last set of Chix Lix on Night Stage. Already? Already.

Ferron

I still wasn’t sure about my voice. I still wasn’t sure if I was going to be able to sing the whole song. I was in my head and doing my best to get out of it because that was the only way I was going to make it through the song. As I said, I was singing “Every Woman” with Toshi first and then I got ready for my song. Chix was amazing that night! {SEE Chix Set List w/ Pics}. I mean I have been quite a few Chix and this was up there as one of the best in my book, but what else would it be? As we started to run down the songs it started to really sink in that this was it. This was really it and then I had to take a breath and compose myself again so I could get through.

When my song finally came up I knew I needed to take my time. As most of you know, I am known for wearing heals when I perform, but that night I wanted to feel the catwalk beneath my feet. So I sat on the edge of the stage and talked to the folks while I took off my shoes and then placed them next to Cathleen who was signing for Chix and then I started the song. I have to admit that it was a challenge at first. I was way deep in my head and I didn’t have time to stay there so I had to move into a different space quick. I had dancers that night so it was a big number. As I said, I sang “Stronger” by Kelly Clarkson, but I changed the words to fit the feeling of the Festival. {READ my Remixed Michfest "Stronger" Lyrics}

Shoes off

After all my panic and concern everything worked out, but I would be lying if I didn’t say that it was challenging. When I’m performing I do my best to be as present as possible especially in situations like this. I want to remember as much as I can. You might be surprised at how many shows go by that I don’t remember a thing that happened. I needed to remember this. To that end, I do remember some of it. I remember walking down the catwalk and touching hands. I remember being at the end of it with the dancers behind me. I remember hoping that everyone was with me because although I could see in front of me it was dark and I couldn’t see behind me because the dancers were there. I did the best I could. I gave it everything that I had. I gave it all the love I had in me to give. I gave every last piece of myself and that was the best I could do. When I came off stage I was shaking my head and later C.C. asked me why I was doing that. She asked me if I thought I didn’t do well because she said it was amazing. I wasn’t shaking my head because I thought it was bad, but because that was it. Singing that night was challenging and I wanted it to come with a little more ease, but it was what it was and it was yet and still amazing. For the encore the girls came out and sang a medley of “Ain’t Gonna Let Nobody Turn Me ‘Round,” “Roar,” and “Amazon Womyn” the reboot and they were incredible. Then at the very end of "Amazon" we all came out had to hold on the last “Rise Again!” while we waited for the fireworks display and what a display it was. We’ve had fireworks at Fest in the past; that was nothing new, but it was the last fireworks we would see like that with those womyn in that place. With the fireworks came the waterworks. I can’t remember whose shoulder I cried on mine, but I do remember folks just standing on stage after it was all over. It was a real moment of disbelief about it all. A real, “What do we do now?” moment. I mean we all have lots to do. There is life going on while we are all on this land of ours and everyday it seems like the world is going more and more mad, but really, seriously (said in my best Bob voice), what do we do now?!

Rise Again!

Chix Lix Band: Revolution

I stood with everyone else just looking out over the crowd of women who slowly made their way back to their homes on the land. As I stood and looked to the sky and out over the people I saw these two young girls standing by the side of the stage looking as bewildered as the rest of us. So I walked over to them and asked their names. They said Emily and Emelia (I hope I am correct about the second name). I asked them how old they were and they said 13 and 14. I then asked them how long they had been coming to the festival and they said 13 years and 14 years respectively. So that was their whole life! What lucky girls. Then I asked them, “What are we going to do without summer camp?” Emily said she had no idea. Emelia said she hasn’t processed it all yet. I asked them where they lived. Emily said Minnesota and then just as quick she said, “You can come to my house and do a show. I have a bunk bed and you can sleep there!” At that moment I knew everything was gonna be alright. I asked them if they knew anyone with a farm and they said yes and I told them to find me on Facebook if they were allowed to be on there and let’s get this thing poppin’! It was such a wonderful moment, but really it made me think about all the little girls that had grown up there. It made me remember Ruby and Maddie and Zander and Jiji and Zuri and Cree and Naiobi and add your daughter, granddaughter or niece here.  Summer camp to the Nth degree.

I have been trying to explain to people for years that Michfest is much more than a music festival. It’s much more than the haters, misogynists and purveyors of negative vibrations of the world put out there about it. It was a magic place and although I might have overused the word magic in this post there is not a much better way to break it down.

After Night Stage on Saturday there is a party in the Belly Bowl for the workers. DJ Rimarkable made that joint happen out of her understanding that the workers needed that release at the end of the week. So for the last five years Ri has been bringing the workers a sweet release. But this year the party for me was bitter sweet. I didn’t dance a lot. I just wanted to remember my sisters dancing and singing and having a wonderful time together. Being free and open. It was a sight to behold and one I will hold in my heart for a good long time.

 Fireworks and Waterworks

Chix Lix: Revoulution (Song List)

Michfest 40

Chix Lix: Revolution

Songs (Not in Order)

1. Raise Your Glass by Pink (sung by Big Bad Gina w/ Gretchen Philips & Animal)

2. I'm Still Standing by Elton John (sung by Holly Hear)

3. Every Woman by Bernice Johnson Reagon (sung by Toshi Reagon, Shelley Nicole, Marcelle Davies-Lashley, Gina Breedlove)

4. Talkin' About Revolution by Tracy Chapman (performed by Bitch and C.C. Carter)

5. Shower the People you Love With Love by James Taylor 

(sung by Cris Williamson and Teresa Trull)

6. Sinnerman by Nina Simone (sung by Hanifah Walidah)

7. Revolutionary Feminist 70s TV Medly by BETTY

8. Woodstock by Joni Mitchell, Tuck & Patti (sung by Gina Breedlove and Christelle Durandy)

9. Earth Song by Michael Jackson (sing by Aleah Long and One World Inspirational Choir)

10. Stronger by Kelly Clarkson (sung by Shelley Nicole)

Encore: Ain't Gonna Let Nobody Turn Me 'Round/Roar/Amazon Womyn

Michfest 40: My Voice and Has Anybody Here Seen the Sunshine? (Part 4)

Friday August 7, 2015
I knew this would be a hectic day. I had sound check for Toshi’s set in the morning (why because I was “crashing” her set too), then I was reminded by Nívea that I was scheduled to be part of the artist panel on the WOC tent, so I did that at 11am, only to have to be at the WOC lodge at 12pm to talk to the women with Yaniyah about what they might experience in the lodge, etc. I usually sweat in that lodge, but after the previous day I realized I was good on the sweats for the week. Earlier in the day Holly Near confirmed that I could sing with her on her set (yes “crashing” this set as well), but there was a rehearsal that I needed to try to make later in the day. I thought I could do it all. It seemed possible, well nothing says time like land time. Yes you can make plans, but don’t cling to them. So what had happened was...

Toshi sound check

Yaniyah and I gave our talk and we got everyone set and ready to go into the lodge. There were enough fire keepers and some extra folks to help so I thought we were all good to go. When everyone was in, I stepped out of the area to get to the rest of the things on my list. I was trying to catch Holly’s rehearsal, but things took a little longer than I expected so I missed it. Luckily I ran into her in the Belly Bowl and she was able to give me the talk through. She also told me that Marcelle and Rhiannon were going to be doing a vox/tambourine number during her set! What??!!! I wanted to be down with that so bad, but not even Holly was involved so I surely wasn’t getting in. After our short talk I figured I would catch Mazz’s set on Day Stage before heading back to the lodge. I’m glad I did because it was killing! I was sad to miss Aima the Dreamer and Reina Williams (two of my faves), but I heard both sets from a distance.

MazzMuse

After Mazz’s set was over I headed back to the WOC lodge just in time for the third door to be open and some folks were out. As is the way of the lodge on the land, you can come out when the door opens if you need to and go back in if you like. It seemed that the third door was long, intense and hot because Shirley asked the fire keepers to open the West Gate to let the air flow through. I checked on a few women to see if they were going to go back in. Some were staying out and others started to make their way back to the lodge.

Without getting into all the details, when all the women who were going back in the lodge were in, something happened outside of the lodge and I had to then work with one of the women who stayed out to make sure she was OK. Again, without getting into all of it I will say that the entire incident just reinforced for me the kind of feelings that were whirling around on the land that week. The exchange with this woman, while I believe was very healing for her, was so intense that I think the incident contributed to me losing my voice. Yes, on Friday night after I finished with Toshi’s set, which I will tell you about, I lost my voice. I think I lost it because I didn’t speak up about what I felt happened that day at the lodge. I know for some of you reading this you might think that sounds crazy or a least really strange, but let me tell you about energy and the use of your voice vs. stuffing things down. I don’t care what the incident is, if things are going on in your face and you choose not to use your voice, you just may lose it; and if not your voice it will be something. The thing is that on the land everything is amplified, but so much is given to the ground, which helps. My mistake was that I didn’t give anything to the ground or the sky or the water I just kept it and it killed my voice at least for a little while. I know there were also other factors that could have contributed to me losing my voice. The dust out there, the weather that day, all the singing I was doing on other people’s sets that I wasn’t totally prepared for. All of these things could have been a factor, but I tell you I felt my voice leaving me as I walked away from the lodge that day.

Now don’t get me wrong, I am not walking away from the lodge ceremony all together. What I mean is that there will still be a lodge in Brooklyn and I will always take the opportunity to be in that ceremony whenever I can. I know how much power is in that circle. I didn’t panic. Well I did panic at first because the last time I lost my voice on the land I didn’t sing for a year and ended up having surgery. So honestly I did panic for a moment, but then my witches showed up and healing began.

On this day I had my final rehearsal with Hanifah and while we were in the rehearsal tent it started to rain like it was nobody’s business. It was at that moment that I started to think about the shows that were going to happen on Acoustic Stage because there is no tent covering there. Cris Williamson and Dance Brigade were scheduled that day and at that time, due to the amount of rain coming down, I figured that they would just cancel the shows on that stage for the day, which would be a bummer, but honestly the rain felt epic.

There are certain places that the Acoustic Stage sound travels, but toward the rehearsal tent is not one of them. So I wouldn’t know until much later that Cris’s show did go on, with workers from the stage standing over the musicians with umbrellas!

Yes hunny! These women held up umbrellas through the whole set. Instruments were covered with clear tarps and the show went on! I heard it was incredible and I’m sad I missed it, but I was glad that those who were willing to brave the rain got a show. Now as for Dance Brigade, they were not able to perform, but as luck would have it they were able to move their show to Saturday in the slot that Ferron was supposed to be in, and she was moved to Saturday night in place of Melissa Ferrick who couldn’t make it due to an injury. Wow! I felt bad for Melissa, I wouldn’t have wanted to miss out, but I was glad that Dance Brigade got to do their thing and that Ferron would be headlining Night Stage one last time.


As time went on I could feel my voice slipping away, but I kept it moving. Elvira’s set was great and like Cris, she did it in the rain. The elements were supposed to let up by 8pm, but no dice. It just kept on coming. Sometimes it would slow down, but it surely wasn’t stopping. The duo of Elvira and Pam Parham her sign interpreter is one that I’m going to miss terribly. I hope there is a way for Elvira to take Pam with her wherever she goes. They are artistically made for each other.

Next up was Holly Near my secret girlfriend. No we are not nor have we ever dated, but she’s still my secret girlfriend. LOL. I love this woman so much! When I got on the land this year she was one of the first people I ran into. We talked for a while and that’s when she gave me an 80% invitation to sing on her set. I was praying for the other 20% and I got it. Holly asked me and a few others to sing on a medley of some of her most popular songs, which was wonderful! I wasn’t even mad about not being a part of the tambourine/vox hit because Rhiannon and Marcelle rocked that joint to the hilt! Daaayyyuummm! It rained pretty much through the whole set and people stayed. It was wonderful!

{Video: Marcelle & Rhiannon Tambouine/Vox Duo}

Then I stepped off and got ready for Toshi’s set. I asked Toshi before we got to the land if I could sing with her on her set. Why? A couple of weeks before Fest I went to see Big Lovely at Lincoln Center Out of Doors and then maybe a couple of weeks before that I sang with her and an amazing group of singers at Joe’s Pub for the Pete Seeger Sing-a-long. All I knew after both of those events was that I needed to sing with Toshi at Fest this year. So I called ahead and made a reservation so to speak and I’m glad I did because her set was off the chain! I sang with the band on the Pete Seeger song, “Which Side Are You On” and then I sang with them on “Sunshine,” which is one of my favorite Big Lovely songs! I was so amped! I was having a blast and that set went on! As I said, nothing was ending on time and nobody cared. It was pouring and Toshi sang, “Has anybody here seen the sunshine? Keeps shining in the pouring rain!” Perfect! Before the set closed we all left the stage except Toshi who broke out into her song “There and Back Again.” Yes indeed. We were going through.

Toshi in the rain!

Trust me when I tell you that more crying happened! Water on top of water.  I was all up in my feelings for sure after that set. Another day was done. We were that much closer to the end. I really couldn’t believe it. My voice was going and we would soon be leaving too. It was all too much.

The blaKbüshe Recording Begins. We're Going in!

The band!

I know that many of you are waiting for my super long yet very detailed account of Michfest this year. I started writing it and then all hell broke loose. Well at least that’s what it felt like over here. But while dealing with the things that hell broke loose I realized that there is something else about to happen that I have to share with folks before my Fest blog is complete. I can’t do anything short and sweet when it comes to this blog, but in this case I will at least give you the good news at the top and full story at the bottom. Well, here goes nothing.

Vernon and I. Beginnings...

Tomorrow, yes this Wednesday Sept. 3rd, Shelley Nicole’s blaKbüshe are on our way to the studio to start recording the next project! As you know this album being produced by Grammy winning guitarist, producer, super cool cat, and just plain old good human being Vernon Reid of Living Colour, Masque, Yohimbe Brothers, Spectrum Road, and many more! Now that that’s out of the way, here are my thoughts on this whole thing.

My first baby

 In 2003 I released my first album, she who bleeds... . It was one of the most challenging ventures and adventures of my life. Releasing that album was like giving birth, hence the title of the album. Sure women and blood can go in a lot of directions, but for me it was both that of the monthly blood and that of the hypothetical blood that I shed to make that first baby come to life.

After the release of the first album I put everything I had into making it work. Kind of like the first kid right? You want do everything perfectly. You want to make sure they are well taken care of, so in that spirit I sent that CD everywhere. I sent it to festival submissions, radio stations, press outlets, called in favors, gave them away to folks I thought could help get my baby heard, I pressed up THOUSANDS of copies (cuz that’s how we did back in the day) because I knew it was going to be a hit and my little baby made a little noise, but then I started to get hip to the game.

I was and am an independent artist. I chose this route. No one has ever offered me a record deal in the sense that we learn about in the fairytale books. I’ve never had anyone ever tell me they were going to “make me a star.” That is not my journey; at least not so far. I know those people. I have plenty of friends who have seen the mountaintop, but couldn’t get over for one reason or another and then come to the realization that they had to get on the good foot and do it their damn selves.

As time went by I realized that my thousands of CDs were not going to be sold in a flash, but I had some good people in my corner; one of the best being Daddy-O of Stetsasonic who was a Motown exec at the time of our meeting, who got on board as my manager. To this day he is the only manager I ever had and he was deeply in my corner. But some of the other help I enlisted really wasn’t helping at all. I took in so much advice from so many different people that it all started to sound like the teacher in the Charlie Brown cartoons. I wish I had $20 for all the people that told me I didn’t fit into a particular box that black folks are supposed to be in to get ahead in this game. Well neither did the rest of my wild and wonderful friends, but here we are, and there I was. Outside, and not sold on what life would be like on the inside of the industry. So I stayed on the outs and rolled with the waves of it all. Daddy-O rolled with me and it was a ride. Thank you sir.

Daddy-O! One of my first believers.

Between 2003 and 2007 I attempted to record another album. In fact I think I attempted twice. What seems like a simple process in the eyes of those on the outside looking in is anything but. Most people on the outside watch a little too much Behind the Music or those types of shows to really understand what it takes to make an album on your own. Anyway, in 2007 I played a Brooklyn Pride event at the now sadly defunct club, Southpaw. As luck or really just fate or goodwill would have it, the club made amazing quality multi-track recordings of shows for artists for $50! Multi-track people! That was amazing. Southpaw had some of the best sound in the city. I don’t think I ever saw a bad show there. Well, we played that show and now I had this multi-track so I said, hey, I’m going to put out a live album. I felt like my studio attempts were just not happening for financial and other reasons.

So I have this recording and I say to myself, I’ll take it to one of my good friends, have him mix it and then I’ll put it out. Boom! Well once again, the slow hand of the indie music biz struck again. I will take the blame for my hand in some of the slow process. I really love my people. I know how talented so many of them are. So when the slow down started to happen with my friend I just decided to keep giving him time to pull himself together, when what I should have really done was just pull the project from him and find someone else. Sometimes, many times really, my big heart gets in the way. My want for everyone to win can be a drag sometimes. It’s taken me a long time to realize that everyone is not going to win the way I think they will. Meaning, everyone has a life’s journey and purpose. Maybe their path is not part of yours the way you think it will or should be. It doesn’t mean they won’t win at their game of life, but it might mean they are not part of your path the way you think they should be. That can be challenging to reconcile. It took me probably more time than it should have to wrangle that project back from my friend and take it to Atlanta for another friend and producer Darren Benjamin aka Daz-I-Kue to get that thing off the ground. Daz is from the UK and I had been a fan of his before becoming a friends. I have to honestly say I think I just injected myself into his life because I admired him so much. I wouldn’t see The Quick & Dirty EP completed until 2009, but with it came two amazing remixes of “blaK Girls” produced by Daz and Lionel Sanchez, Jr. and an remix of “Dance (Flying Home)” from my first album by my #1 supporter and producer/DJ extraordinaire, Ian Friday.

My Second Baby

Daz-i-Kue

Ian Friday

So now I’ve got this live album. I wasn’t even going to do an album release for it, but I was convinced otherwise so we did it up big. It was an amazing night with a ton of spectacle. I will say this about myself. I do know how to put on event on a tight budget and make it look like there was a lot of loot involved. I know I’m not alone in this. We have to be crafty in this town to pull things off.

I have been riding The Quick & Dirty EP since 2009 and once again I never thought it would take this long to start this process again. Since The Quick & Dirty came out I released it again as The Quick & Dirty EP: More Dirt and V. Jeffery Smith and I added a new song to the project and and Lionel added a remix of my song “Give it to Me” for the new pressing. I also released a lyric video for “Punanny Politixxx” produced by another musical genius in my life, Jeff Jeudy, that I wrote during the Obama re-election campaign. Also as many of you know one of my biggest stopgaps came when I was poised to produce my album with Toshi Reagon. I did an Indiegogo campaign to raise funds for the project and then my voice went all haywire. I will not recap all that again. You can go back and read the blog [In Gratitude... : June 25, 2012] if you like.

Toshi Reagon. Thank you!

When the smoke started to clear I knew that some things had to change. I knew that I had to change the kind of singer that I have been, dare I say all my life. I knew that I never wanted to lose my voice like that again. I knew I needed to work on my mind and my body so I did just that. I knew that you were waiting on an album from me, but I had to be OK with letting you wait a little longer. Thank you for your patience. Thank you so much for standing by me during this growth process. I have learned so much about myself and about how people show up, or not.

I am not just a member of my own band, I am also a member of an amazing band called Burnt Sugar. I’ve had the pleasure to travel the world with them and now they are my family. I’ve been in large choirs, but this is the biggest band I’ve ever been in. Once you are part of Burnt Sugar you are always part of Burnt Sugar. You can expect a call at any time. It’s just like that.

I have been in musical circles with Vernon Reid for a long time, but it wasn’t until 2011 that we really started to get to know each other. Mikel, one of my Burnt Sugar fam, asked him to sit in on the Burnt Sugar/David Bowie show at Lincoln Center. I think he was just supposed to play on one song, but then he fell in love with the project and with band and just like that Vernon was a part of Burnt Sugar. After that, Vernon set about to record the band doing those Bowie tunes from the show. Yes there is a recording out there, but I’ll only say this about it. We recorded this project just as I returned from headlining Michfest in 2011. It was the last thing I recorded before having to shut everything down to deal with my voice. What a ride.

In 2012 Vernon conducted Burnt Sugar doing the music of Steely Dan, which is an amazing show. We did it originally at Lincoln Center and then at various venues in NYC. Then we got the call that we were taking it to Paris! Yeah, we were going back to Paris. So in the winter of 2013 we went back and I was sick as a dog. You can read my Paris blog [Next Stop Paris! :February 18, 2013] for those details, but I will recap one thing that I didn’t put in my blog. When we got off stage that night and were walking back to the dressing rooms, Vernon rolled up next to me and said, quite matter of fact, “You’re next.” Me a bit confused asked, “Next for what?” He said, “Next to conduct this band.” Now that totally came out of the blue. I wasn’t expecting that at all. I didn’t think I had done anything to warrant that statement. I mean honestly I was just glad to make it through that show because I had been so sick. It would take me some time to realize that what he was really saying was, “I see you.”

Burnt Sugar in Paris!

As 2013 forged ahead I knew that I needed to start raising money for my project again even though I had no idea who was going to produce it. So that’s when I did the blaKbüshe Wellness Days and the silent auction. I just took that money and squirreled it away for whenever the time was right to pull it out. As I thought about producers a few people came to mind and I had a few conversations with different people, but nothing would stick until the day I decided to ask Vernon.

I had prepared a whole speech for him about why he should produce me. I was convinced that I would have to convince him. Well I was totally wrong. I asked him, he said yes and then started to tell ME why he wanted to do it. OK, now that was totally unexpected. To say I was elated was an understatement.

Now we are at the beginning of this long story. What I mean is that on Wednesday, September 3rd 2014 we are going into the studio to start recording the album. Yes, after I don’t know how long, it is about to begin. I have been saying that I feel a bit like D’Angelo, minus the drama, because it’s been over 10 years since my first studio album. I know things take the time they take, but I’m going to do my level best not to have this take 10 years again.

I’m so excited about this. I’m also feeling very emotional. Those folks who are my good friends know you might get a random, “I love you” text or call from me at any time. Yes I’m that person. Sometimes my emotions just take over and I have to tell people how they have impacted my life or that I’m just feeling them in that moment. I can’t believe that tomorrow, Wednesday, Sept. 3rd, 2014, I am starting this process again. I never got off the path, but this studio thing is such a thing. LOL

I still have fantasies of taking my band upstate NY to some fabulous barn and being there for a week or two with nothing else to think about, but making music and laughing together and clinking some glasses and having a good time. I know some people still make records like that, but I haven’t had that luxury yet. So until then, we will do the best we can and make the most of the time we have together in that bubble that is the recording studio.

In this moment I am remembering the times with my first producer and friend John Meredith. I am remembering the innocence of those moments we had together making my first album. He believed in me and all he wanted to do was make an album. Recording music was/is his passion. I knew nothing about making a record. I put all my trust in him, but it was a challenge. I am a live show kind of girl. Meaning I feed off the audience to do what I do and at that time I had only been in a vocal booth maybe once in my life. The road to that first album was quite the journey. Bless John for walking with me through my insecurities at that time. I know this time will be so different. I’ve had more experience, etc. But I can’t forget where I’ve come from. I can’t forget all those living and some who have passed who believed in me. Lighters up for Kim and Zook...

Here we are people. We are walking thought the door once again. I don’t know what’s on the other side of this one, but I’m ready for whatever this next phase has in store. So, before you start asking a lot of questions about when it’s dropping, slow down and know that it’s coming. The baby arrives in its own time. We will not be inducing labor. When we have named the baby I’ll let you know. In fact, when there is anything to tell you, I’ll let you know. In the mean time know this. The fetus is growing. Ashe!

Me and Vernon at the Crossroads...