I am on my parents back porch in MA and I can hear the water fountain bubbling, which is attached to the Koi pond that my mother dug herself. I call her the black Martha Stewart. There is a grasshopper trying to write with me or at least he seemed chill enough until he launched headlong my way. Really son? My grandfather is inside asleep. My parents are also inside watching golf. Yes, these are my people. It’s peaceful out here in the yard. I can hear the sounds of nature. I haven’t been here in a while, but my mom asks me if I want to take home some kale so I know the crop from her square garden was good this year. Clearly she managed to keep the deer and other hungry wildlife neighbors out. I am home and thinking about home. Home, the place that will crack you open and you won’t even know what hit you. Home. The place where everyone knows your name, and can lift you up or tear you down with just one look. Home.
Thursday, August 6, 2015
This was supposed to be my chill day. No rehearsals, no set, which meant time to do whatever I wanted to do. I signed up to keep fire at the sweat lodge that morning for the moon lodge with Fyre. I actually wanted to sit the lodge, but I knew we needed morning help. Just to be clear, morning help means that you have to be at the fire and starting to get it going by 5am. So there was no hanging for me on Wednesday night. I had to go right to bed after Night Stage.
Thursday morning I woke up early and got myself down to the lodge. That day I was keeping fire with Sharon and sadly I can’t remember who else, but it could have been Lola or Laura. Anyway, Sharon told me she wanted to go in the lodge that day. I told her that I wanted to as well, but knowing that we needed fire keepers I just opted to sit out. Well we talked about it and decided that she would do two doors and I would do two doors. But somehow it worked out that Sharon was able to sit all four doors and I sat two. Well, let me tell you, those had to be two of the most powerful doors I have sat in a while because afterward I was just a ball of tears. OMG!
When I came out of the lodge, Shirley was coming up from the Womyn of Color (WOC) tent dedication. I heard the African drums coming over the hill and I felt an urge like no other to be near them. So I just rolled down there fresh out of the lodge and ran into my friend Jaz and her wife Shawnta and proceeded to cry like a baby. I came in right at the moment Yaniyah was giving this powerful speech about Lisa who is there in the damn tent! I was done. I mean it was amazing and powerful and necessary and on point and I was a puddle through it all.
When that portion ended, the women who were instrumental in starting the WOC tent were brought up. I know Amoja and I believe Lola (not the one named above) were part of that and sadly I can't remember who else (if you know please let me know and I'll add them), but let me say I could be off about all the names because I was a hot mess at this point so I slipped out the side. I just couldn’t take anymore as the women started drumming again. I dragged myself back up to the lodge, rinsed off, got dressed and headed back out into the world. Not the real world, but to Festiland.
That day on Day Stage was Round Robin with Nedra Johnson, Gretchen Phillips, Holly Near, Marcelle Davies-Lashley and Cris Williamson and then Cocomama. Needless to say I missed both sets because after the lodge I was scheduled for a massage, but not just any old massage, a hot stone massage! Yes hunny, there were hot stones in the woods! So after the massage, even though I was melting, melting, melting, open to the point that someone could probably put a hand through me, I thought it was still a good idea to go see Gina Breedlove at Acoustic Stage. What was I thinking?! Really, what the hell was I thinking???! That woman proceeded to sing the house down and then start speaking in tongues to boot! Now just stop it. Folks didn’t know what hit them that afternoon. Sheeettt! I don’t know what hit me, but what I do know is that after Gina’s set I was damn near inconsolable. Anybody that came near me I could feel all their stuff. I was feeling everybody’s sadness, joy, anger, devastation and even numbness. I was a mess! LOL! I can laugh now, but that day, not so much. I know people that encountered me were probably like, “Whoa!” I was gone baby gone...
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| Medusa & Gina Breedlove |
I wanted to stay for Marga Gomez, but I knew I needed to eat to find my way back to the ground. Also at some point during the day Elizabeth Ziff asked me if I would sing on the BETTY set. Great! But I’m a mess! She had no idea or maybe she did, but either way I had to pull it together.
Night Stage that evening was BETTY, Jill Sobule and Medusa. I really love them all and all my people were playing that night as well. Well, that’s crazy to say cuz all my people were playing every night on every stage, but that night I knew I would be up watching everyone.
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| BETTY |
I pulled myself together enough to find something to put on for the BETTY set. It was just one song, but that now made two sets I had “crashed.” It was lots of fun to sing with Alyson, Amy, Elizabeth and everyone else who was asked to chime in the “E-I-E-I-O Yo!” chorus. Hey why not? I won’t get this opportunity again, like this, here.
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| Medusa |
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| The Mama's Hustle Band |
After the BETTY set, I quickly changed back into my “street clothes” to enjoy the rest of the night. Jill and Medusa were amazing as always. I first met Medusa in 1998 while working at VIBE magazine. I was invited to speak on a panel at a hip-hop conference at Oberlin and she was there as one of the musical guests. I had never heard of her before and for that event she came as Medusa and Feline Science. Her DJ then was Dres who has now gone on to take the yoga world by storm. Anyway, ever since that first meeting I have been in love with her style and that final Thursday night on the land she brought it along with Julie Wolf, Vicki Randle, LaFrae Sci, Kofy Brown, Shelley Doty, Judith Casselberry and Tammy Brooks. That set was nothing short of the super power that is the Gangster Pussy she sings about! And with that, another day is done.
Thank you sister for these great posts and stories from the land. You really made me live some of those moments again. That day it was me starting the fire with you and Robin. You two had it under control so I was simply organizing the wood and the kindling. Such an activity really grounded me. Which I understood later that day it was very needed, because you and Sharon wanted to go into the lodge, and you both did, leaving me outside holding the space and carrying the rocks. This was specially important for me. First because I was sharing the space with you two, and second because I was trusted with such a task. I was ready, thanks to the morning, the fire and the womyn around me. I was ready because I was no ego. I really had a liberator feeling that lodge and it served so much for everything that happened after during festival (specially the incident in the other lodge that left you without voice, which I was fire keeping and which also left me without something).
ReplyDeleteThanks Shelley. Hope we get to share time around lodges and fire again sometime in life.